Beez Neez now Chy Whella

Put Right

Big Bear and Pepe Millard

Sun 9 Nov 2014 23:57

Putting Things Right – This Blog is Not For Small Children or Anyone Taking Beta-Blockers

Now we were bowling along, as you do, when all of a sudden my brother happened to annunciate in a firm and forthright fashion that it had come as quite a shock to see my rear end in a blog wearing thinning knickers. I wracked my brains, Bear denied taking any such photograph but hearty agreement from my sister-in-law - who I thought to be of sound mind, decent memory and just stance - put me into a veritable conniption. “We’ll show you.” Up came the world wide web, up came the blog, date found and tad-dar. But that’s not my rear end it’s Bears......... “No it’s not it’s yours, men don’t have gussets.”

Nothing for it but to examine this problem very minutely and indeed seriously.

Just supposing the rest of the BARB’s, dear faithful Barmy Army of Readers of the Blogs think the same..............

Just supposing any of our new readers have come in at this point and naturally jumped to inaccurate conclusions that this could well be my rear end.

Thing must be investigated and proven forthwith.

I went direct to the source and found said blog to get a starting point. Pictures above.

Copied directly from the entry dated the 16th of February 2014, entitled Another Week On.

The week began with not a bad view. All that was left of my poor bow thruster motor. A skipper who is on a promise to try NOT to get into trouble through clumsiness, walking into wet varnish and generally causing my wrath to raise its testy head. I am serious about trying, really............. Yes dear and don’t let me hear Arrrr from you lot out there.

Now, the thing is, I write the blogs as our faithful followers will know to be true. When Bear adds to the blog when I get him to check through them before I send them, take a breath, he knows to change his to italics and his speech colour. When said first began to appear a long time ago they were indeed blue a different blue to the blue that shows what I / we want our BARB’s to look at or see in any given picture.........but when I changed laptop that colour was harder to find at speed so I simply went bottom of the second column of easily available colours without having to dig in ‘more colors’ and there you have it, take another breath. Why would I type ......not a bad view and colour it known and explained shade. Had it been my rear end, Bear would have had to have taken the picture and it would have been ........not a bad view as himself, the dear captain would have added it.

“No, men don’t have gussets and I believe there to be more than a hint of cellulose and I don’t believe men to get that.”

Oh so now you want to get personal about the man I’m married to, steady, see warning signs...............

Paint Pepe’s face a deep shade of puce and reduce top lip to a thin, menacing and threatening line......

Now as proof source, I went to get external hard drive entitled ‘Photographs’ and found these pictures, a Bear leaning for something higher in his tool shed and either earlier or later but nonetheless cooler of a very similar pose, wearing tee shirt. No one can argue the validity of my claim that these two pictures are indeed of Bear, Captain, husband, best friend, backgammon loser, huh, cheek, don’t bring me into this, well you are, it is after all your rear end or cheeks that are in question, nay doubt and subject of a false claim.

“No men’s pants don’t have gussets.”

I’ll prove it, drop your shorts and I’ll show you in graphic evidence.

So here you have it. Nothing for it but to take a photograph of brother in the self same posture to prove that he too sports said “gusset”. Although, there was of course the much predicted back chat and hands-in-the-air denial. I’ll go so far as to say that compared to Bear this is quite a scrawny little gusset filler complete with frontal seam, something Bear does not like due to potential chafe............

.............and another thing. Anyone who ‘sports’ this particular pair in their collection should really take care before they pick up stones in a glass house – Tidy Whities, more like Saggy Baggies.

ALL IN ALL VERY PLEASED TO PUT THIS PARTICULAR BLOG TO BED..........