East, no West!
Sat 6 Dec 2008 16:22
Noon Position: 30 47.0 N 062 47.7 W
Course: West sou'west Speed: 5 knots
Wind: Northeast, moderate breeze
Weather: overcast, light drizzle
My track is resembling my state of mind. Yesterday I decide to continue on and this morning I have once more decided to turn back for Annapolis. I have never before been in such a quandary. But I am coming to the conclusion that apart from a few practical problems in my life I am just having difficulty coming to terms with giving something up which I have worked most of my life towards, realizing it is, after all, not something I really want. Well this is probably not the place to discuss my inner turmoil.
I have just finished reading Lord Jim, he is shot, executed is the word Marlow uses, by the village big chief in retribution for being responsible, albeit indirectly, for his only son's death, a fate which Jim willingly confronts:
"But we can see him, an obscure conqueror of fame, tearing himself out of the arms of a jealous love at the sign, at the call of his celebrated egoism. He goes away from a living woman to celebrate his pitiless wedding with a shadowy ideal of conduct. Is he satisfied - quite, now, I wonder?"
I will just sleep until we get to where ever this crazy skipper ends up taking us. Mary, you sure gave be a tough assignment taking care of this guy.
All is well.