Position: Ushuaia, Beagle Channel,
Chile
Date: 19 February 2012
I’m afraid I’ve been very lax on the blog front. This one
was part prepared a few days ago and finished just now. I will soon update you
on the start to our second cruise of the Chilean fjords.
We arrived back in Ushuaia a couple of days ago, feeling
rather nervous. The Pirates of Dawnbreaker had declared war whilst accepting our
hospitality on Mina2 by stealing Dolly Mk2 from our backstay and replacing her
with a tin of Heinz Baked Beans relabelled “Dolly Mk3”. They then upped the anti
(sic) by writing highly derogatory remarks about my blog on their website. I
quote:
“An animated discussion of the appropriate
use of Maydays quickly turned to the topic of a certain English blogger who
writes the tabloid of blogs for the unwashed masses. We couldn’t help but be
appalled by his cavalier attitude towards life and death, and his profiteering
from others misfortunes to boost his ratings with sensationalist headlines and
grandiose stories. We can only hope that his readers will see through this
grandstanding and turn to a more scholarly and respectable blog such as
ourselves.”
You,
Dear Readers, the unwashed masses? I can almost see you blanching at the insult.
And so was I. How very dare they.
Of
course, this is all driven by jealousy. They had heard that Mina2’s blog was, in
January, the most-read cruising sailor’s blog in the universe with a hit count
that reached many thousands (true, thanks to you all). Dawnbreaker’s ranking, on
the other hand, was pathetically low. To see why, have a look at www.blog.mailasail.com/dawnbreaker. A great loss of Scandinavian face.
But
such scurrilous accusations cannot pass without comment, so I managed to hack
into Dawnbreaker’s blog and posted a correction, together with a link to Mina2’s
blogsite so Dawnbreaker’s few followers could see what a proper blog looks like.
It
took Dawnbreaker less time to discover my hacked posting than I had imagined.
They were incandescent.
As
we approached the quayside in Ushuaia, the whole crew of Dawnbreaker were there
waiting for us, bristling with indignation but, as we drew alongside, I waved a
white flag of truce (perspicaciously handed to me by the DS sensing the ugly
scene that was developing). Everybody fell about laughing, and the coarse
reprobates of Dawnbreaker and the sophisticated crew of Mina2 are once again the
best of friends.
The day before yesterday our wayward daughter, Selina,
left after our memorable first two-week cruise of the Tierra del Fuego fjords. I
pretended I was sorry to see her go, but after the usual divisive tantrums on
board, and particularly after she tried to rip my carefully nurtured Antarctican
beard from my face, frankly I was glad to see the back of her. She can go back
to her yurt in the UK and good riddance.
What a shame she didn’t get to meet Andrew, our latest
crew-victim, who arrived 24 hours later. We’d not met Andrew before. He is the
son of the brother of a close friend. Swiss/Argentine, he arrived after a long
journey from Geneva. Charm
personified, he came loaded with thoughtful goodies – multiple bars of the
finest Swiss chocolate, nut cakes, and home-made cookies baked by his
girlfriend. The only contra-indication is that he has a beard. Never trust a man
with a beard - that’s what I say. Also, disturbingly, he drinks nothing but
water – no tea, no coffee, no alcohol. I’m not sure if this is a good thing or a
bad thing. On the one hand he won’t be drinking me out of boat and home like the
Three Drunks but, on the other hand, can you really trust a teetotaller? But, as
an indication of his sensitivity and thoughtfulness (so lacking in Selina) he
brought, being an avid Mina2 blog reader, a little friend for Able Seadog Snoopy
- an adorable, cuddly Swiss St Bernard dog.
ASD Snoopy got frightfully overexcited. Immediately they
began sniffing each others bottoms, and in no time “Bernie” was licking Snoopy
almost to death. Snoopy was in heaven. He’s been on board for four months and
has been craving a bit of dog company.
Tomorrow morning we say goodbye to Christine &
Fernando who return to Buenos Aires (Fernando having almost reached the end of
my long list of “Things For Fernando To Fix”), and the DS and I, with
Andrew, ASD Snoopy and Bernie clear out of Argentina once again and flog our way
back to Puerto Williams to clear back into Chile for our Chilean fjord cruise
Mk2 for the next three weeks.
