Calypso's Web Diary
Joe Drury
Thu 9 Jun 2011 09:00
Today I'm feeling a bit gloomy, it was a long night defending myself from the pirates, luckily my sword fighting skills are up to scratch, if they persist tomorrow I'm going to load up the cannons. What I'd really like right now, is a long soak in a nice hot jacuzzi, my parrot agrees with me...
If you are now thinking "he's had it, the cheese has definately slid off his cracker", actually I had a bit of a long night, a pod of whales was swimming with me from 2am till 4am. (That is true, not like the pirates, which is a scenario I invented to help me sleep) Every 20 seconds or so they (or he/she, maybe there was only one) would sound, which sounded something like: mmmmhhhhhooooooooeeeeeyyyyy.... This would reverberate through the hull, causing the poor sleep-deprived skipper to rock backwards and forwards at the chart table clutching his knees in fear. I thought about frightening them away with my air horn held underwater (one ping only, said with a Sean Connery accent) or turning the engine on, but I didn't want to p*ss off something that weighs as much as a volkswagen. Or is it tongue the size of a volkswagen? Anyway I tried to convince myself that the sound I was hearing was something else, at one point I told myself it was the water rushing past the toilet bowl outlet, causing the same echoey noise as when you blow across a bottle top, but one can only bullsh*t oneself so much, so I went on deck with my big torch, and yep, a big ominous shiny thing breaking the surface just off the starboard bow, Jim. So not a good night, in all.
Now I'm having my morning coffee, typing away thinking I was a bit girly last night, but put yourself in my shoes for a minute... I'll bet you'd be on the radio calling up the nearest Icelandic fishing fleet too.
It reminds me of the joke my mum used to tell me, I'll try and get it right: A brummie is sat by a canal fishing, his mate comes up and says "what have yow caught?" Brummie says "a whale!" "Blimey" replies his mate, "a whale, like mawby dick?" "Naaaww," the brummie replies, "a boicycle whale".
Shut up we think it's funny don't we mum?
Anywaaaay... back to yachty things, yesterday was a miles disaster, as those of you who look on the tracker can confirm, I think I made 89 miles, against 156 the day before, completely blowing my average speed. I just hope that the light airs hit the rest of the fleet too, or at least blighted some of them. Today doesnt seem too much better, 3 knots, but crucially, in the right direction. It seems that out here I can either go fast, or go in the right direction, but sadly not both. The Azores seems a long way off, I can fit my position and the Azores on the same chart now, so I can see myself inchworming my way across the screen, at this speed, another 6 days. I'll be well into the tins by then, even the dodgy ones, like spaghetti hoops or stag chilli.
Until this afternoon, Calypso out.