Still in Bonaire

We bought a whole tuna from what appears to be the only fresh fish market in Bonaire, which also appears to be, - somebody’s private house. In fact the whole family came out to serve us. And yes the fish did look seriously fresh and if you gave it a good slap and a bucket of fresh sea water, I’m sure it would have swum away. This big fat fish was filleted by the family’s granddad and then cut up into smaller chunks ready for the girls to make sushi. Granddad wielded his super sharp filleting knife in a flamboyant Zorro style, milking the occasion and playing to the crowd and we all said 'woooow' and 'woooooh', much to his pleasure.

The usual 'sundowner crowd' gathered on Malarkey that evening and the girls huddled down below for their first lesson in sushi making from the resident expert Kathy off S/Y 'Dream Ketcher'. Kathy has legendary culinary skills and Joanne & Sue were particularly keen to learn the skill of preparing sushi. The 'boys’, on the other hand, and I use the term 'boys' loosely, were in the cockpit drinking beer, waiting for the results of our beloveds labour, with baited breath.

Well, we waited and waited, and a fair few beers were sunk before the fairer sex eventually arrived with the fodder……and even then, it was just some more prepared ingredients for the fodder yet to come. Yes, there was still more work to do. But this time in the cockpit, ‘cos this time it was going to be messy.

They each had a go at rolling the rice, raw tuna, spring onion, cream cheese, cucumber and crab salad into long sushi rolls between bamboo mats - all very authentic, and then cutting them into smaller sushi bite size bits. By now we were all getting pretty damn hungry and were well looking forward to our much talked about new adventure into this fashionable raw fish cuisine. Brian was so hungry he was about to go off for a pizza in the interim period.

The sushi rolls were all carefully prepared, some more than others - Joanne’s looked more like a Viennese Whirl ice-cream rather than a sushi but they did look very pretty sitting there nicely presented on a serving tray.

We were now about ready to scoff the lot in one go. I took the first one and a took a bite, then a second and took a bite and finally a third …..well what can I say……I was hoping to find a piece of sushi that tasted of something other than sticky goopey rice. If it wasn’t for the soy and wasabi sauce, the sushi would have tasted of nothing. This fashionable food is exactly what it looked like, - nothing but dressed up balls of rice with raw fish. On that tasting, I formed the opinion that this kind of dining was a load of pretentious bollox and should be left to the Japanese who invented it, probably because that was the best they could do to liven up dull rice and raw fish, - the only staple food stuffs available to them at the time.

However, all said and done, I guess this is all about taste & opinions, and opinions are like arseholes, - everybody has got one. And Brian & I were clearly out numbered by the raw fish chomping crowd, by a good six to two. The rest loved it, Jo included, mind you, even she didn’t like the look of the ones she had made.

I am fairly open minded and prepared to give it another try,....... but if you marinade the raw tuna in Neil's (S/Y Adonde) special homemade marinade and sear the fish on a hot barbeque, then you have a meal worth exercising your jaws on. -  It looks like food, smells like food and by golly gum drops, it tastes like real food. I guess Brian & I are just hearty meat & potato men and not ashamed to admit it. Eating alittle tasteless food regularly because it is said to be 'good for you' just doesn't sit well with us. The jury's out on that one. Please send your thoughts to www.whogivesashit/'Caveman vs the Tree Hugger Debate'   

Even the rat we had on board didn’t seem to like the sushi ‘cos we think he’s scarpered........... Yes, this is where the rat bit comes in.

During the afternoon of the sushi evening, we found an unwanted guest in the cockpit. How the rat got there is anyone’s guess but he was there alright, all brown and furry with flashy needle like teeth and an ‘up yours’ look in the eye. Now, I am not the best lover of rats and this one seemed to be aware of that snippet of information and seemed particularly leary, sunning himself on Joanne’s dive bag. I plucked up enough courage to try and zip him up into the bag but he was too quick for me and dived under it.

That’s it, - it was time to call in the troops, this was serious business. A rat on a boat is no laughing matter. They can cause untold damage and ruin your day.

I called for Jo, the great animal lover, she would know what to do. She suggested we carefully assist the rodent back into the sea, where he can make good his escape back to whence he came. I voted for the simpler option of bashing the blighter over the noggin with a broom. There was no time for a discussion. The captain (me), had spoken, but the Admiral (Jo), had overruled!

Working as a reluctant team, we barricaded the rodent into one area of the cockpit. The idea was for Joanne to lift the bag and for me to encourage the rat, with the broom, in a seaward direction, before he could run & hide in the many nooks & crannies down below. Well, our best laid plans went completely awry. I was armed ready with the broom and Jo was to lift the bag, - which she did to her credit but then ran off screaming, with the rat chasing her.

Why do beasties do that, - instead of running away, why do they run straight at you?.. Anyway, after a few frantic moments and a lot more screaming, mostly from Joanne, we managed to brush him out of the cockpit and onto the bathing platform. We nervously peered over the back expecting to see him swimming away in the sea but there was no sight of him. The whole affair was as funny as you like but was he still on board?. Did he cleverly manage to escape undetected via one of the engine vents or just run up onto the other side of the deck getting ready to reveal himself again when our guard was down. Anyhow, there was no further sign of him. And in retrospect, I believe that to be worse,…you know, the not knowing thing.

Jo, promptly sped into town and bought some more rat traps just in case. We laid three traps that night and Jo spent the first sleepless hours on 'rat watch' listening for any scratching noises. The rat horror stories during the sushi evening didn’t help either……thanks guys.

There were no snapping noises from the rat traps during the night and Jo did eventually get to sleep. We think he did actually leave the boat that afternoon and swam back to shore........... Or then, maybe...... he didn’t.  

 This rat is on the wanted list. If you see him report it immediately to www.malarkeyratwatch.com