Legalised Piracy in St Maarten & a show down for a ho down in St Thomas
MALARKEY
Jo & Trevor Bush
Thu 3 Apr 2008 21:50
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Puerto Rico 18:20.2N 65:37.4W
Well we finally got our generator fixed and left
Antigua for Barbuda......mind you, now that we have got it fixed, we are too
nervous to use it in case it breaks again.....a bit of a pointless exercise
really and damned expensive too. Ho hum, at least we are on our way again with
our hearts filled with joy and adventure. And what will Barbuda and the Virgins
have install for us today then children.....well ooh er missus, I like the sound
of the Virgins but before that, we get to experience the delights
of Barbuda, St Barts and St Maarten.
We had good reports about Barbuda and so decided to
give it a go. The decision was not taken lightly due to the conditions. It was
going to be a bit of a slog in sloppy seas, going to windward, through a dodgy
reef. There were times on the passage we had second thoughts, well at least I
did, Joanne only had one thought........sleep through it down below in comfort,
bless her cotton socks!. It proved to be a damn fine sail in the end and we
arrived in good enough time to snorkel on an impressive reef. The water was very
clear and the reef and fish were....well.... reefy & fishy but there was a
considerable surge going on due to the recent high winds & so our time
snorkelling was cut short. The island itself was your typical desert island with
long white sandy beaches, palm trees and the occasional holiday development. But
as we were there mainly for the snorkelling we decided to leave for St Barts the
following day.
 St Barts is where the wealthy but not so
adventurous Americans get their taste of France. It has all the posh designer
stores and swanky restaurants with swanky prices taboot. Not our scene really
for two reasons....our idea of top fashion now-a-days is a pair of funky
coloured plastic fake Crock style shoes priced at $10 and the days when we had a
few bob to spend on haute cuisine have long gone. So having watched the rich & famous spill their
lobster thermador down their Armani suits we decided to move again.....do I
sound a tad bitter? not a bit of it...the bar stewards!!!
So we moved from Gustavia (the main town anchorage)
to Anse du Grand Columbier, an attractive anchorage on the west coast. Well that
proved to be a good move. The anchorage was very sheltered with free moorings in
a delightful setting. The snorkelling was fantastic too. The water was so clear
it was like swimming in an aquarium with loads of fish, reefs and even an
interesting wreck to look at thrown in just for good measure. I could
have stayed there for a week but Joanne had got a taste for shopping having
looked around the designer shops in Gustavia and so with one look at her please,
please, can we, can we face we were off to St Maarten where, as a duty free
island, even we might be able to afford to buy something.
St Maarten is renowned through out the cruising
community as the place to buy your boaty bits. It is a duty free
island with good engineering & boaty services in abundance. What
they failed to tell us however, was that the prices to go into the lagoon had
gone up by a factor of five...yes five.......there's inflation for you. And,
this is where the legalised piracy bit comes in, the Dutch Coast Guard vessel
was going around the lagoon fining people $300 dollars for speeding in
their dinghy and fining them another $300 dollars for not having life
jackets & flares with them at the time. If they didn't get you in
the dinghy, they would board your yacht and if they couldn't find anything
to fine you $300 dollars for, they would ask for your papers and if
you only had photocopies of your original purchase agreement, then you
guessed it, you would get slapped with another $300 dollar fine. You can imagine
that this whole thing was getting people a bit miffed particularly as there
was no notice anywhere to inform you that there was indeed a speed limit in the
lagoon and that life jackets & flares where needed in the dinghy and that
only carrying a photocopy of your ships documents was a capital offence. The
whole thing stank of Dick Dastardly and the Sheriff of Nottingham. What we
needed was a Robin Hood to sort things out. And Mike from Skankies, the local
Dutch radio net controller, tried his best, but quickly crashed and burned.
Jo & I were constantly on our guard and
developed good avoidance skills. We managed to miss the fines but still managed
to spend the equivalent of 10 fines on unmissable boaty bargains such as a
wind generator (not going to be held to ransom by a dodgy diesel generator
again), new anchor and a complete set of dive equipment for the both of
us.
  So fully kitted out we sailed overnight to the
Virgin Islands to meet up with Adrian & Jan (Squander) for some recreational
diving and stuff.
Well we went through the Virgins like Casanova on
Viagra.
Squander was no where to be found in the British
Virgin Islands so we said good bye to Richard Branson on his private Necker
Island and headed off to the US Virgin Islands.
 Bye-the-way, that is Branson's little holiday pad
on the hill with a few gazebos, private harbours and yachts kicking
around.
Adrian & Jan were in St Thomas doing the
'Wal-Mart's thing, so we scooted off down there and joined them. We managed to
get a good evening in at the Latitude 28 Bar & Restaurant. We had the
biggest steaks ever and watched Dick Solberg and his Sun Mountain Band
strut their stuff on the stage. We joined in with the 'ho down' and
this 'Red Neck Fiddler' was as good at telling jokes as he was playing
the fiddle. It was a great introduction to good old southern hospitality with
Aid & Jans pals Dennis (the chef) and Barbara, who they met in Venezuela,
providing the goodies. It was a taste of things to come for the Squanders as
they are heading North for some more American um..er...Americaness.
 So before you could say 'howdy partner' we were off
to the Spanish Virgin Islands where the definition of a Spanish Island Virgin
is........ a girl that can out run her brother!!!
These islands were in total contrast to the BVI's
and USVI's. Thye are sparsely populated with little in the way of infrastructure
but with fantastic beaches, great diving and cheap rum bars. What more could you
ask for. So we did the cruiser thing....went diving and had some rum....kicked
around on the beach and had some rum.....went to the rum bars and had even more
rum. All in all a jolly good time.
But this winter so far in the Caribbean has been
unusually wet & windy and dare I say it..a tad chilly at times. So we have
had to keep a close eye on the weather. The Virgin Islands have just suffered
the worst sea conditions this time of year since way back. It has been quite a
talking point. So when there was a weather window, we left for Puerto Rico while
we could and incidentally, before we had spent sufficient time to give the
Spanish Virgins justice. But unlike Aid & Jan, we will return on the way
back East & South to Venezuela and get some more diving in if we
can.
So what can I say about Puerto Rico....well quite a
lot really. It is like the Bronx of the Caribbean. We had our first murder
nearby just a few days after our arrival. Some guy was shot 28 times in his car
in a drive by shooting. It happened just outside the car hire place we were
using and police are now looking for either a limp wristed hood with an Oozy
9mm machine gun or a blind jealous husband with a 9mm hand gun. Cripes, 28
bullets to kill one guy. No wonder the Americans have such a huge defence
budget. On that note I will end this blog and save the rest for the next
one.
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