29 02N 52 32W
Things have changed a bit around here. I wouldn’t call it a mutiny as such, more a regime change….but…..well…..the skipper and first mate are now locked in their cabins. The floggings we accepted as part of good discipline and the scurvy and rickets as a part of life on the ocean wave, but we could not accept the first mate’s lack of adherence to the rota. We all bought into the rota and acknowledged that there would be times when things would be difficult, but we would work through them and overcome. But to OVERSLEEP on two consequent days was not the sort of behaviour that we wanted to be part. To add insult to injury the explanation – ‘nobody woke me’- well this was the last straw. The first mate has been locked in his cabin to think long and hard about the rota where he will remain until he has at least washed and promised to stop singing peculiar Scottish chants and shanties. It was also disappointing to have to lock up the skipper as it was felt that she had something to do with the rota as she was conspicuously not included on it – so in her cabin she will remain with a bucket of fish until the real recipe for the banana cake is provided.
As for the suffering crew we are doing well. I’ve changed my name to Long Ben Nelson Hornblower and have decorated myself with a huge earing and ponytail. We have re-organised ourselves and we are doing ok. The rota has been replaced with a daily stand-up meeting where we set clear objectives and targets. We start each morning with a cup of excellent tea and exercise, then a good wash. No singing is allowed unless it is Elvis. We have even recruited new crew members from wayward ship Skyelark and have ambitions for further expansion maybe even a TV reality show.
As for the skipper and first mate, the skipper made a quick escape and was last seen making off with the wayward skipper of Skyelark and a full bottle of ketchup. The first Mate, we understand has accepted a new position as chief rota executive organising all flights in and out of London Heathrow.
And for any one at home reading this everything is really ok the skipper and first mate are doing a superb job of keeping us and the boat safe until home, with the skipper providing both bacon sandwiches and a banana cake and the first mate always with a cup of tea ready and a word of support.
And most importantly, for Lyn, Jack and George at home, I’m missing you more than I can say and can’t wait to get home and looking forward to long walks in Portscatho – ‘the sea shall not have me’ love Ben XXXX