Cool runnin' - BVI's January 2012

Tillymint.fortescue
Wed 4 Jan 2012 18:08

Two years on and the Motley Crew of Tilly Mint have once again been hauled, legless and reeling, from the taverns of Peaslake and transported to the pirate infested waters of the Caribbean. The assizes judge showed great leniency  in sentencing the miserable souls this time round; a mere 10 days of hard labour would not shiver their timbers to the same extent as the 6 week ARC voyage of 2009, but then he wasn't allowing time for the luxury of an Atlantic voyage with 15 days of surfing rollers and gentle adjustment to the 4 hour time difference or idle days over the next month to sleep off rum punch hangovers in deserted mangrove swamps. The modern age of jet travel guaranteed that the crew arrived tired and disorientated after a 20 hour marathon of DVD watching and sleep deprivation. Jet lag was going to prove a deadlier enemy than piracy and mossie bites, time is a flexible concept in these waters but we might be pushing our luck to herald in the New Year at 8pm.
 
Day One
Rolled up late in the evening dockside in St Thomas in the US Virgin Islands, a trading outpost of Fifth Avenue where pirates trade Gucci and Bulgari contraband for local gold trinkets and rum and more rum and rum.Tilly Mint nestles below the shadow of a Tommy Hilfiger emporium and First Mate Immy noted that she could purchase 4 brands of handbag without losing sight of the mother ship. We met up with our recently pressganged crew, Chef Natalie & Captain Bill, who are destined to ply the waters for eternity looking after Tilly Mint and her charter guests, but for us it would be a brief encounter as they are taking a break from eternity and going home tomorrow for a well deserved holiday......but not before a farewell breakfast of Natalie's fabled pancakes
 
Next day
Woke early, Hugo the Powder Monkey said he'd been reading since 3am (he'll be past his sell by date before lunch.....). Skipper Alex and Bill spent some hours in a strange male bonding ritual which involved getting very sweaty in the engine room, taking complicated bits out of the boat and putting them back in a different order. They ended up wiser for the experience but without having fixed the problem that drew them there in the first place, which we all know to be a familiar tale of boat mechanics. In the meanwhile Natalie whipped up a wicked batch of rum laced pancakes and gave us a tour of the ample and tasty provisions she had brought on board for our voyage, there was even tomato puree so we felt at home! Our voyage has the potential to be most lavish wall to wall gourmet cooking experience- a nautical "Ready Steady Cook"
 
The plan for the rest of the day was hatched with haste and not hugely well prepared for so keen was the Skipper to cast off (we had no biscuit tin to hand, the voyage was doomed before we started). We set sail for Virgin Gorda, some 6 hours north of St Thomas. However after nosing out into the Atlantic waters we quickly changed our mind. It was the Solent with sunshine, lumpy waters and a wicked wind dead on the nose, shadows of sea sickness passed over the faces of the feebler members of the crew and bottom lips were seen to tremble so we changed course, turned left and headed for nearest of the British Virgin Islands, Jost Van Dyke (no relation to Dick). There are lots of Virgin Islands, so named by Christopher Columbus after St Ursula and her 11,000 virgins and latterly by Richard Branson. Indeed we have been teasing Immy that BVI stands for Branson's Virgin Islands and she has been casting suspicious side long glances towards the grown ups wondering if she can trust the tale. It is a great joy to waft among these islands, even though we were being buffeted by feisty 25 knot winds and cooled by occasional rain showers and cloud cover. The weather has attitude this time round so sign yet of the crystal clear calm waters of our previous trip. By sundown we were safely anchored up off Jost Van Dyke and more than slightly windblown (who said they were looking forward to lots of fresh air this holiday?). The galley slaves raided the fridge and effortlessly rumbled up a quick beef stroganoff followed by the pancakes left over from breakfast. Culinary stakes were starting high........
 
The Day After That
 
Immigration, that ritual of island hopping, bureaucracy in paradise, was at its most amenable in Jost Van Dyck. Skipper did the form filling while I sat on the dock of the bay watching the children frolic in the surf and the palm fronds sway in the wind, next a cooling drink in a beach side bar, the day was starting tough! Back to the wind, it made our bay somewhat choppy and unwelcoming for jumping off the boat so we crossed the channel to a bay with more shelter and passed more of the day in a haze of aquatic pursuits. By late afternoon we were in bother,  a steady flow of fresh lemonade during the day had done wonders to stave off scurvy but jet lag was setting in, limbs were limp, heads were nodding and there was mutinous talk of a 'quick doze' before supper. So we rowed ashore (metaphorically speaking in the dinghy, with an engine) to look for a local cure. We found it in Happy Hour at Quito's bar, a local concoction of rum, more rum and a splash of fruit juice and coconut milk called The Painkiller and it's companion (without the rum and more rum), the Virgin Painkiller. It worked, the children were once more frolicking in the waves and the grown-ups' conversation became animated and witty, indeed the skipper was laughing at my jokes by the end of the second dose such was the potency of this local medicine. Quito's Friday Night Fry Up from the beach BBQ completed our rehabilitation and we managed to stay awake til 8.30pm.............
 
The Last Day of Last Year
 
Another day dawned windy and overcast and the Tilly Mint headed northward towards Virgin Gorda, Neckar Island and the Bitter End Yacht Club where beautiful people in outrageously large boats would be gathering to see out the old year. Concerned that we wouldn't blend in amongst the locals ashore (on so many levels but especially as we had not yet seen diners in the pyjamas by 8.30pm and this was New Year's Eve with the unspoken expectation that you would stay up til midnight), we choose a remote anchorage away from the melee and decided to throw our own Private Island Party. A large security cordon was thrown around the boat and the Skipper set off with the youth in the crew to knee board around local waters in search of the 'ultimate wipe out' to entertain guest with later over dinner. As the sunset Hugo was put in charge of security and made sure that no riff raff slipped in alongside the A Listers on the  guest list. Laurence turned his hands to cocktails, I prepared dinner and then Immy & Alex cooked up a storm on the topside BBQ. Bob Marley played live(ish) in the cockpit. We dined in fine style and excellent humour and partied hard til 8pm when tidings of New Year from the homeland came rolling in. Then we settled into watch some unexpected after dinner entertainment. Abromovich had booked the Red Hot Chilli Peppers (they're a band Pops, not a BBQ ingredient)  for his New Year's Bash but I bet he didn't have what we had....sharks circling the boat....just vegetarian ones mind you (in case Nana is fretting). Immy was adamant that she would never swim again and tested the claims of vegetarianism by chucking it an apple (which was ignored). We thought about chucking Hugo in to further test the theory.....but thought better of it. Anyway we partied on with a board game and the last die hard guest rolled down the companionway to bed at well past 9.30pm.
 
Somewhere in dreamland the horns and hooters from the city of yachts moored in the distance roused us from our slumbers, it was now definitely Next Year
 
 
Happy New Year
 
Well it's still very windy but apart from that it's picture postcard perfect. We spent the morning eating more of the ship' supplies as Immy and Hugo made us brunch, then off to a beach to do, well ,nothing really, apart from get wet and marvel at the gorgeousness of it all. Then off to another beach to marvel some more and take the first Painkiller of the day. Then back to Tilly Mint for another Painkiller which reminds me of the quote of the trip so far. Laurence is our cocktail maestro and in charge of the bar. Hugo has his own responsibilities, one of which is to open and close the valves to the holding tanks which contain the waste from the heads when we are at anchor. When offered this role of great importance he said....'What!!! Laurence gets to make the cocktails and I get toilets...!!!!!!! Well  it was funny at the time, maybe that's the Painkillers at work. Off ashore to dinner now, hoping to find the chef sober and some food left after last night's revelries!
 
Ended up in the Pub at the Bitter End Yacht Club eating burgers and watching American football as the restaurant couldn't find us a table til 9pm, which by our reckoning was breakfast rather than dinner
 
Today
 
Another cloudy, windy morning, we nearly need sympathy where it not for the inevitable sunshine and turquoise waters that will emerge later....An early start saw us slip anchor from The Bitter End and head south to the other end of Virgin Gorda to a beach called The Baths which is, in a phrase, a beach as designed by Fred Flinstone. The small stretches of beach sits along the edge of a peninsula strewn with vast glacial boulders (and I mean vast - bigger than a house). The thought that a glacier passed through these parts is intriguing to the crew, it would explain the cooler moments in the weather for one thing.....eh.
 
We had a good snorkel and then a scramble through the boulders, half rock climb and half pot holing, to the remote and desolate bar at the end of the beach, just near the car park and across from where the cruise ships moor.....Despite the crowds it was the most idyllic beach, sugar crystal sand and crystal clear turquoise water. Back to Tilly Mint for lunch then a meander to Spanish Town for a new bottle of gas so we could continue cooking up a storm on Tilly Mint. Skipper disappeared off in a taxi to find the gas and the children and I took refuge in the marina bar, and guess what, they ate burgers and fries and watched American football on TV.......
 
We then had a beautiful sail into the sunset to Cooper Island where we have found a tranquil ( i.e. no blessed wind) anchorage for the night. We dropped anchor and Laurence dosed his parents up with Painkillers again and all is calm aboard, everyone with their heads in a book, sated from day of swimming and sun. It's dark now, nearly 8pm and thoughts are turning to sleep, after all somewhere on the planet it's bedtime....
 
Later that night...
 
Careful what you wish for on a  boat. The flat calm up top at bedtime was a sinister lure like the siren song of a mermaid.....sometime in the night someone turned on the nautical washing machine, the waters around Tilly Mint went onto a gentle wool wash cycle and the night's slumbers turned into a slow motion roller coaster ride. We woke early grumpy and cross and it was raining, bother and dash said all, there's trouble in paradise this morning. Anyway, before you worry too much our troubles soon evaporated, the sun came out and we went ashore to to find a really cool bar next to a mangrove fringed beach,  sun loungers in the shade, lovely calm waters for canoeing and donuting and the ongoing spectacle of herons diving for fish...the day flew by and it was happy hour before you could say 'mine's a painkiller'. Next off for another fine dinner aboard, fish pie and chocolate mousse on the menu tonight
 
Tomorrow and the day after that
 
Another glorious day, we have decided to hang up our anchor here at Cooper Island for a couple more days as we lack for nothing.  All the boys are going scuba diving to look at the old wreck of the Rhone tomorrow. Sounds like Skipper and me after a bottle of Chateau Neuf du Pape but it is apparently a wrecked ship...
 
Pancakes for breakfast, Lunch on board and supper ashore today just to mix up the routine and the other big news is that I've finished my book and have to decide what to read next, busy, busy,busy...!!
 
 
 

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