Feeling Hot Hot Hot
Cruinneag
Thu 8 Dec 2011 19:47
TOAST TO THE LASSIES - Trevor Watson, 6th december 2011
I only realised when the Gardner first grumbles
Into life in Las Palmas that - Guys! We're Outnumbered!
Four solid fellows with stout hearts of oak
Who inject, drink, ingest and pretend not to smoke
About to set sail across the rolling Atlantic
All eager and willing and a tiny bit frantic.
Our skipper is Nick, full of resource and cheer
Then there's Trevor who likes motorboats and drinks lots of beer
Steve's got his own yacht so is a useful Jack Tor
And Raman who's talent's wasted when not running a bar
A sound group of lads although it would seem
They wouldn't get started without the ladies in the team.
Mother Nature herself provides both wind and ocean
And Susan the pharmacist mixes lotions and potions
With Sailing experience and a sweet gentle nature
(Unless you ask hubby steve, who wouldn't pick the same features)
Our First Mate is Karen who victualled and planned,
Gives galley and heads training and checks watches are manned
As a bonus in her bikini, she's some serious eye-candy
So is probably seen as a threat by wee Dandy
Who is our ships dog and likes all the attention she can get
So she's a foot warmer and vacuum cleaner as well as a pet.
The fifth of our lassies who brings all these together
Is a gorgeous old girl in fine oak, teak and leather.
Cruinneag III is our home, our carriage, our shelter
And when the Red Baron is full she's quite the wee belter
Though 75 years old now and with creaks, groans and aches
She's keen for adventure and leaves joy in her wake.
So please join me now and raise up your glasses
And let's drink a toast to these, our fair lassies.
It's day 18 at sea and we're at meltdown point...less than 300 miles to our destination and there is not a breath of wind...and oh good lord is it hot. The crew are starting to fight over the few shady cool spots on deck...below deck forget it. Dandy the dog has implemented fart warfare to make sure she gets the best shady spot and everyone else is lying around in a heap. During the mid-day watch today I was keeping cool by having my own private wet t-shirt contest on the aft deck while watch-mate/swab boy Raman watched a Dvd in the 3 inches of shade he could wrestle from Dandy. Everyone else watched dvds in the saloon until the fishing Rod started rattling and next thing you know we've bagged our biggest catch yet...a Dorado we reckon must way the guts of 30 kilo...that's dinner for the rest of the trip sorted!
The last few days have been a mix of super chilling out with the engine on and sails down, and frustration at slow progress and knowing we need just 12 hours more sailing to have enough fuel to motor the rest of the way...otherwise a tactical fuel stop in Barbados may be in order...we're hoping not to have to do that. Of course running the engine and no breeze just adds to the crazy heat.
However despite these hardships we are keeping in good spirits. We had our 500 miles to go party the other night which involved Raman and Karen co-hosting Rum'ns Bar annual Craft Fair where the crew all had to make their own unique hand puppets in order to earn a drink. Well the creative juices just flowed and we ended up with the Pickles Partnership producing 'The Proclaimers' - of 'I will walk 500 miles' fame. Nick and Trev managed to produce naked porn star hand puppets...a little worrying - whilst I made a snowman and Raman a gingerbread man (in fairness, we had the instructions...then lost them overboard!) The challenge was then set to come up with a play to perform with the puppets the following night. Later that evening we had our 500 miles Burns Night feast and Nick and Trev cooked up Haggis, Clapshot and a whisky sauce. The weather gods intervened and dumped about a ton of rain on deck so we had to eat in the saloon for the first time which was nice. Trevor blessed/dressed/attacked/something the Haggis which involved chanting some mad Scottish chant that only Susan could understand and stabbing it with a fork! He then did the traditional toast the 'the lassies' which, frankly, was brilliant, see above.
Yesterday was baking hot so while Steve and Susan were on Watch, and Raman and Trev sunbathing on the aft deck, myself and Nick broke from our Backgammon marathon to do an impromtu man overboard drill - we were so hot we considered diving overboard ourselves but though better of it so Fran the Fender went over and was successfully recovered after the crew got over the initial shock of the splash followed by me yelling 'Man Overboard'...in the end Nick, Steve and Trev all dived overboard to retrieve it and have a cheeky mid-atlantic swim.
Last night after another long hot day it was time for the puppet show and drinks at Susan's 'Should have gone to Specsavers bar'. How she smuggled those sunglasses through customs who knows!!!
So now we wait for wind, we hope to give the Baron another great outing to finish what has been an epic crossing for the 42 year old spinnaker!! For the sweepstake Nick with his optimistic Friday lunchtime arrival is now out of the running...I'm still feeling confident for my Sunday lunchtime bet but would be happy to give my hula hoop up if we get in Saturday.
Next blog may be at sea...or may be on land...watch this space and think nice strong southerly winds please :-)